We are all unique individuals – the way you lead most effectively will differ from the way others lead
One of the most difficult things to remember is that what you want to say matters far less than what they need to hear. This is the essential principle behind clear and efficient communication.
When I say I trust, or don’t trust, someone, what am I actually saying? What is it that I am trusting or not trusting?
Trust is one of the fundamental aspects of the relationship between leaders and followers – whatever it is, it lies at the core of leadership and all human relations. Continue reading “Trust Everyone 100%, 100% of the time! – Part 1”
In ‘Trust Part 1’ I looked at what it was that we trust, that when somebody ‘betrays your trust’ what they’re doing is displaying an aspect of themselves that you were previously not aware of. So they are asking you to change your assumptions about who they are and how you relate to them.
Ever felt hassled? Overwhelmed? Confused? Unable to make a decision? Caught up in events moving too fast for you?
Have you ever found yourself thinking or saying– “I’m too busy to relax!” when you’re stressed and you remember that leadership/mindfulness/stress management course you went on. Or when a colleague, trying to be helpful, suggests that you slow down or just relax a little? Part of you knows you should try, but the rest of you is so caught up in the momentum that it seems absolutely impossible …
The moment I speak of is this moment of choice – to choose to act rather than re-act, to dare to be spontaneous, to create, to change. This moment, that has never happened before and will never come again …
You know the situation- you start a discussion with the sincere intention of exploring what the best solution would be, then, a few minutes later, you find yourself digging in deeper and deeper to defend an opinion, a position, that you didn’t even know you held two minutes before!
You’re in a meeting. It over runs but you can’t leave and you know you’ll be late for the next one and you won’t have time to read the papers for it … You’re sitting at your desk, absorbed in your work, then you see your watch and realise you’re late for a meeting and you haven’t prepared for it … You’re on the tube/metro and it just stops, no apparent reason, and the time ticks away and you realise you’ll be late for the meeting but there’s no signal for your phone … Familiar?
In pre-workshop interviews when I begin working with a team, I ask everyone, “So, how good is this team on a scale of 1 to 10?”. Most people will score their team around 7, 8 or 9. I then ask a second question: “OK, but really, in terms of unity of purpose, unity of vision and unity of action, how good is this team?”. “Ah well,” is the usual response, “if you’re talking in those terms, errr … 3 or 4?”